Handkerchief, His Story

Handkerchief, His Story (Opening)


It was a rainy Friday morning. Dark and gloomy, the sky cast a shadow over me, making me lazy.

I was on my way to work when I saw this old man trying to pick up his handkerchief which has dropped on to the ground. He tried bending down to pick it up, but his body would not allow him to do so. At his age, that action would consider suicide.

The handkerchief was laying in a pool of mud. It was so soaked with it that it looked like a piece of discarded tissue paper. Most people would just leave it and get a new one instead. But not for this old man. He kept on trying his best, whatever he can do, just to retrieve the handkerchief.

He was soaked to the skin. The plain white shirt sticking to his body like a second skin. Anyone can saw that he was freezing. He was hugging himself, rubbing himself, trembling, shivering, yet, there he stood in the rain, looking at the handkerchief, trying to do his very best.

I went over to him, without saying anything, stepped in to the pool of mud, fished up his handkerchief and passed it to him. He was surprised, but his hands were already holding on to the handkerchief the moment I fished it out for him.

He stared at the handkerchief for awhile, oblivious of my presence. I tapped him on his arm and told him that he can have my umbrella. He refused and in turn apologised for not thanking me. I shook my head and told him that it's just a small issue.

He smiled at me, nodded his head, and start trudging to the opposite direction. His pace was slow, laborious, almost to the extend of shuffling his feet. He was hunching, he couldn't see clearly in the rain. He was still freezing. The view, was as of an lonely old man, walking through his final days, with no one, no hope, no light, no goal, no destination to look forward to. However, his hands were buried into his chest. Clutching on to the handkerchief, as if it would flew off like a kite with a broken string, whenever it has a chance. Offering as much protection to it, using his frail body to shelter it from the elements of nature, as much as he possibly could.

I called my boss and told him that I would be late, He acknowledged it and I gave my thanks and hanged up. I caught up with the old man and shared my umbrella with him. He was surprised again and kept on declining my offer. I told him that he looked a lot like my late Grand father and he silently accepted my offer.

When we reached a bus stop shelter, I took out my jacket and helped him put it on. All the while, he was silent and I didn't mind. Sometimes, silence just speaks louder and better than words. He looked better after I zipped him up and we continued walking to where he stays.

He was still clutching to the handkerchief, gripping on to it, fearing that it would drop and be lost forever. He would look, stare at the handkerchief, time to time. His eyes, were full of emotions, everytime his eyes met the handkerchief . Full of sorrow and sadness, and yet, at the same time, filled with longingness, hope and love. Conflicts of emotions can be seen on his face, but his face did not betray anything more. The rain did a good job of covering it up for him.

He found me stealing glances at the handkerchief and I turned away a bit too late. He smiled at me, asked me whether do I want to hear the story behind that handkerchief. I look at him, struggling. A part of me wants to know all about it, the other part believes that it might recount some sad memories of his past. He seems to read my mind, as I had hesitated a tad too long. He told me not to worry, because it was he, who offered his story to me. I nodded...

And so, this is his story...
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Handkerchief, His Story I


It was in the year of 1930s. I can't remember well, it was so long ago... I was only a teenager then, working as a coolie. The working hours were long and the work was hard, but, I was happy. The job allow me to earn money and I managed to save some money and send the rest home to my parents who were living in China.

Life was hard, plain and simple. But I was contented. I didn't have many desires. I just wanted to have three meals and a roof over my head, which I did have. Life was monotonous until I met this girl.

It was one night, I was chatting with my fellow mates who were living with me in the same quarters. I was feeling peckish when suddenly, I heard the sound, 'Tok-Tok' It was the Tok Tok mee seller. I excused myself from my mates and I went downstairs to intercept the noodle seller.

When I reached downstairs, I was mesmerized by the lady who was standing in front of me. She was not pretty, not beautiful. She was radiant. She stood there looking at me while I was gawking at her.

She muttered an almost inaudible 'Excuse me' and I was broke from the spell. I walked towards her and I handed her three cents without saying anything. She kept the money and brought out a bowl of noodles from the basket she was carrying. The noodle was still warm and steaming. It tasted especially delicious that night. From that night onwards, I forgo my dinner and instead wait for her 'Tok-Tok' mee. Every night, at 7.30pm on the dot, the 'Tok-Tok' sound will echo through my windows and I will go down and get myself a bowl 'Tok-Tok' mee.

For six weeks, yes I still remember it was six weeks. This routine never broke at all. Until one night, we were made to work till late. A shipment of cargo was delayed by the monsoon wind and it arrived in the night. It was until 1130pm when all the cargoes were unloaded and we were allowed to go.

I was tired and hungry. I wanted to go sleep early despite the growling stomach. However, when I reached my quarters, she was standing downstairs, with that basket of hers. My spirit lifted and I was no longer tired. I walked briskly towards her, digging into my pocket for the 3 cents. She took out a bowl of noodles, still the same as ever, warm and steaming.

I was sweating while having the noodles. The weather was warm and I had just finished work. I was basically eating and sweating. It was then, at this time, she took out her handkerchief and wipe my sweat...

He paused as he looked at the dirty handkerchief. His expression was a deep contrast from what it was from moments before. It is now fill with sadness, a tinge of regret and a bit of loss. His lips were quivering, his cheeks twitching. His eyes were a bit teary and yet filled with the feelings of love. Reminiscence, as the feelings of yesteryears, not erased.

I immediately understood the importance of the handkerchief. It was a memento, a memento of love. A promise of life together, till death do they part. It was something that keeps him living till now. A symbol of hope, encouragement and most importantly, a presence of a loved one.

At this point of time, the old man became silent. He was catching his breath. He sounded tired, but his face was full happiness. His eyes had a sparkle, a fire, as if he was in love once more. His steps were a bit springy and he walked a tiny weeny bit faster...
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Handkerchief, His story II

Prelude

It took me quite a bit of time to get this part of the story done. I have been busy for the past few months and the last draft that I have saved for this story was lost due to a technical error by blogspot.

The old man in this story is real. His story is one of those of what our forefathers had went through. He is a living history textbook. Someone who could tell you what had happened to Singapore, to China, to Thailand and anywhere else where the Second world war had left its trail at. He went through all of it head first, hands on. Been there, done that and came back alive.

He could tell you how Singapore was before the little red dot is as what it is today. From an island which was only well known for its port and deep harbor, to a first class country today. He could tell you how it was when Singapore was under the British colonial rule, till the day Singapore achieved her independence, not by choice, and how she weathered the storms and lasted till the present.

He is able to recount tales of horrors about the violence, the crimes and the vices when Singapore was still in her infancy. Stories about racial clashes, bombings from the communists, freedom fighters for independence... Stories about heroes who tried to bring the country together, while some died trying.

However, of all these facts and history of tales that were long forgotten, he did not chose to tell me about them. For it wasn't because of these long forgotten tales that he opened his heart to me. It was something else that has opened his heart to me and to recount this tale of ancient past to someone who lives in the present.

Two different people, two different men. Two different age groups, two different generations. An old man who went through life no matter how hard it has treated him, a young man who has just started to see the world and trying to learn the meaning of life. Both came together and shared this tale of love and life, due to one handkerchief..

His Story

The old man looked at me and smiled. I realised that he is not shivering that much anymore. Maybe the walk home actually warmed him up, I won't know. Or maybe the memories that he is recounting is giving him the strength to move on in life... No matter what are the reasons, one thing is for sure. He is looking better, healthier and strangely a bit younger...

He took in one deep breath and started to talk...

After that night, that handkerchief stayed with me. I told her that I would wash it and return it to her the next day. I did wash it, but I never returned it to her. When she came the next night, I told her that I still has not washed the handkerchief.

She looked at me and giggled. Letting out a little laugh and trying to stifle it. She told me to keep the handkerchief to myself. I looked at her wide eyed and she started to chuckled. Mind you my dear boy, it was the first time I was ever in love with a lady! I was so embarrassed that I didn't know what to say. She knows what I'm thinking...

I was giggling softly to myself when he was narrating that part. It is unbelievable that an old man like him was once, like a boy. He was so embarrassed about it that his face turned bright red. The way he protested about his naiveness and his innocence, was like a small kid who had told a friend that he was in love with someone else.

I used to think that it was never easy to connect to the older generations as there were too many things that kept us away from one and another. However, at this moment of time, my views changed. There is still one thing that could connect anyone from any generation at any given time... And that is Love...

She brought out the steaming noodles from her basket and handed it over to me. It has always been like this for as long as I remembered. She would pass me the noodles and we would sit down and chat while I'm having my noodles. We chatted long into the night and every time, she would always leave for home at 11pm and I always walked her home. The walk under the moonlight, was one of the best times that I could ever have...

It was about a year later, I was promoted to be the supervisor of the coolies. My pay was increased and I was given new quarters to live in. My boss encouraged me to work harder so that I can go further. I had a good boss... He treated everyone good and equal.

That night, when she arrived with that basket of hers, I told her the good news. She was elated and she was much more happier than I am. She took my hands, made me stand up, and danced around with her.

When the initial excitement wore off, she looked down. I asked her what made her feel so down. "Now you are a supervisor, your pay is much higher than what you have last time. Now you can eat better, you don't have to eat my noodles anymore..."

I was astonished. I don't know what had given her the idea that I would give up her noodles. Sure, it wasn't the best noodles I had, but it was prepared with a lot of effort and that's all it matters to me. I looked at her and there she was, staring at the ground. I did something that I have never done before...

I lifted her chin with my fingers and I looked into her eyes. I told her that no matter how much money I have, I still won't give up her noodles. Yes, I do agree that we can have better food, but its her noodles that brought us together in the first place. And so, it will be the noodles that will bond us together...

Her eyes went teary. I didn't know why I said that to her at that moment. But I only knew that those were the words that has been in my heart for a very long time. I have always wanted to tell her but I could neither find the chance nor the way to tell her. Somehow I did it at that very moment...

The very next week, I hired a match maker and went to her house to ask for her hand from her parents. Her parents were delighted to have me as their son in law and the match maker was fantastic. The date for the wedding was set at the month of June, which was two months after.

We started preparing after the match making session. I sent a letter with some money back to China to my parents. I wrote to them, telling them that I got myself a pretty and hardworking wife and asked them to come and attend my wedding. By the time I got their reply, they were already here...

My parents had a meeting with my future parent in laws and both families were very happy with each other. They decided on the wedding gifts, dowry and all the things needed for the wedding. My future wife and I were not allowed to see each other for the rest of the days till the wedding is done.

23rd of June was the day when the wedding was held. It was a joyous occasion which only happens once in a lifetime... It was also the most memorable time of my life. The one day that I can never forget... The banquet lasted till late at night. I told myself on that night, I will never ever left my wife suffer...

Everything was going on smoothly after our marriage. My wife lived with me in the quarters that was provided by my boss. My boss doesn't mind, and he even sent us a big bed as a gift. The both us were trying to turn that house into a home.

However, good times don't last long. At 1937, Japan invaded Jehol... Boy, do you know where's Jehol? It's just beside Manchuria... My parents sent me a letter telling me that China is going to be attacked by Japan. I sent a letter to them asking them to come to Singapore so that they can escape from war, but by the time the letter reached them, it was too late...

The old man trailed off... He was almost choking when he was narrating this part of his life to me. One could see his emotions as it was displayed right out in the open. His eyes couldn't hold the tears that was trying to escape. The tears, mixed with the rain, ran down his face freely. One can be so sure that he was crying even though the tears has been covered up by the rain...

His eyes were red, swollen. His shoulders was heaving, and he was breathing hard. He was sobbing...

The invasion of Jehol has escalated in to a full scale war between China and Japan. My parents were living in Nan Jing. Boy, is your history knowledge good? Do you know what happened to Nan Jing during World War II?

I nodded my head. In the year 1937, when Japan started a full scale invasion on China, one of the cities which fell and was subjected to the worst atrocities possible was Nan Jing. The people of Nan Jing neither fight nor surrender. They just walled themselves in so that they could keep out the japanese.

However, this only angered the japanese even more. At 1 pm on that fateful day, the japanese decided to invade the city. The japanese virtually walked in to the city of Nan Jing without any resistance. The reason for Nan Jing not to fight is to offer a peaceful surrender so that no one would be harmed. However, the idea failed and it caused great grief to the chinese by the japanese.

Over the course of six weeks during Nan Jing's capture, the japanese committed all kinds of atrocities that is so inhumane that even the hardcore Nazis were shocked.

There were about 1000 cases of rape each night and many more cases in the day. The moment one of them resisted, its either a bullet to the head or a bayonet stab to any part of the body. Civilians were either buried alive or being tortured to death with ways unimaginable. Looting was common and arson was one of the favorite sports that the japanese enjoyed.

The incident was so bad that it was referred to the Rape of Nan Jing or the Massacre of Nan Jing, where the water in the Yang Tze river turned red from the dead...

My parents were there when it happened. The letter never reached them... I was devastated when I heard the news. I never had the chance to be filial to them. Just when I thought I could do my part, the war by the stupid japanese took them away. My wife was there with me when it happened. All she could do is to console me. The grief brought to me was great. But because of my wife, I have to stay strong.

We carried on with our lives but we kept ourselves updated with news of the war. However, the peace that we took for granted came crashing down on us. On December 10th, 1941, the news reported two warships being sunk off the coast of Malaya. The japanese reached Singapore on the 7th of February, 1942.

I volunteered to be a soldier and told my wife to stay with her parents and I promised her I would be back alive. She took my hands, kissed my face and told me that she will believe in everything I said. Before I went, she passed something to me. It was her handkerchief. The very same handkerchief that brought us together. And now, it fulfills its promise of bonding us together...

The old man took a look at the handkerchief that he is holding. It was the handkerchief that brought them together initially. It was the same handkerchief that has seen them come together and also leave each other.

The old man's face was full of sorrow while looking at it. Although the tears never flow, the pain in his heart was much greater than anything else he has gone through.


He never said anything after that. He was silent. His hands, clutching on to the handkerchief tightly. There was no exchanges in between us. He neither talked nor do I. The rain seems to be never ending and the way back to his place was so long...
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Handkerchief, His story III


The silence was deafening. The steady sound of rain drops amplified the fact that no conversation was taking place. I felt bad that he has to bring up so many bad memories so that he can relate his story about the handkerchief to me. Suddenly he looked at me, and said...

You don't have to feel bad boy... Memories, no matter good or bad, are here to stay. I know what you are thinking and your face shows it all. Good memories stays so that you can always think about them and draw strength from them. Bad memories stay for a reason too. They allow you to know how much you have went through in life. Bad memories allow you to learn from your mistakes, experiences...

He trailed off, then took in one deep breath...

I left to join the volunteer corps. The fighting was fierce and we fought valiantly. Everyone gave their very best to fight for the place that they had called home, but Singapore still fell in a week. A lot of my friends perished... We were devastated when we heard the news that the British had surrendered. Our efforts and the death of our friends were in vain.

I was captured as a POW and was sent to Changi prison. The living conditions there was worse than anything else. Most of the POWs gave up this misery and chose death. I wanted to join them too, but something kept me going on. It was this handkerchief... I had to stay alive no matter how bad the condition was. Because I had promised her, I would go back to her alive.

I do not know how long was I captured. Until one day, the japanese opened the cell door and ordered us out. We were made to assesmble in the courtyard. I thought they were going to execute us. However, they did not. Instead, they packed us up on to a few trucks and sent us all the way to Siam. (Siam is the old name of Thailand) We were sent to build the Death Railway.

We were made to work day and night and I have seen a lot of POWs die from fatigue. I kept on telling myself I will not give up no matter what happens. I have to go back to her alive... I didn't know how long I was at the Death Railway. It was until one day when one of the japanese ordered us to get on the trucks and sent us off.

At first, I thought we were being sent to another part of the death railway. But as the journey gets longer, I realised that we were going back to Singapore. Along the way, we saw people from the Allied Powers. British, Americans, Australians... My heart lifted and my spirit soared.

The war is over!

When he came to this part, his face showed relief. It was as if he had just relived that part of his life again. However, within relief, I can sense another deep seated feeling. A feeling of sadness, a sense of loss...

When we reached Singapore, the British took care of us and help to locate our loved ones. They sent me back to my in laws house. The moment I reached, I saw her. She turned when she heard the car. She cried when she saw me in the car. She ran towards me when I stepped out from the car. She threw herself towards me and I caught her with my arms. She was crying uncontrollably. She cried so hard that her whole body was trembling. She cried until she went soundless and she hugged me so tight as if I would be away again.

I told her that I'm back and I fulfilled my promise to her. To come back alive. She said in between sobs that she had always believed in what I said. I took a long look at her. She has grown so thin, her clothes hung loosely on her and she looked so tired.
I hugged her and tell her that I'm sorry that I had allowed her to suffer. She kept on shaking her head and said that it wasn't my fault. She knew that I had to do what I need to do and she was proud of me. We stood there hugging each other just outside the door.

Suddenly I heard a voice coming from behind the door. A voice that I have not heard for ages. It was my boss. He came out, extended his hand and welcomed me back. I took his hand while looking at his face. He looked much older than he should be.

I remembered his looks when he was before the war. A man who used to have a wad of thick black hair, facial features that's so well defined that it looks like it was chiseled out from marble. A man which such built that even the biggest sized coolie would shrank away from him if he was angry.

But now, all of those has gone away from him. He looked frail, with very little hair and he shrunk in size. But those of eyes his, they still sparkled, with life and hope.

He had taken care of my wife while I was away fighting at the front. He kept themselves away from harm by bribing the japanese soldiers. He promised her that he would took care of her until the day I come back from the front. He is not only my boss now. He is also my benefactor...

My in laws were captured by the japanese and never returned. My wife was safe because of my boss's influence. However, he could not protect my in laws. He apologised to me that he couldn't keep them away from harm's way. I looked at my wife and my wife told him that there are somethings that are inevitable.

We went back into the house and I was asked to wait at the dinning area. After awhile, my wife came out with a bowl of noodles. It was the same noodles that brought us together. The Tock Tock Mee.

I broke down the moment I saw the noodles. It was after so long and after much hardship and suffering that I managed to see her noodles again. All the memories of how we knew each other, how we come together and how we left each other came flooding back.

She was sitting beside me, smiling and crying at the same time. I took her into my arms and told her I will never leave her again... She nodded her head and said that she believes in everything I said. I took her face in my hands and told her not to cry. I'm back alive, safe and sound.

Her face was wet with tears and her eyes were so swollen. I took out the handkerchief from my left pocket and wiped her tears. She was surprised when she saw the handkerchief. I told her that this was the only thing that kept me going when I was a POW. I told her that the handkerchief reminded me of her, her love to me and mine to her. It kept me going on even at the toughest time. It was the one thing that kept our hearts bounded throughout the years...

He looked at the handkerchief again. I can never guess the original colour of the handkerchief. It was so stained with mud that it looks as if it is brown by nature... It wasn't a very elaborate handkerchief. Just a simple normal piece cloth made of cotton. However, it gave a man the courage, the strength that he needed for him to survive the horrendous years.

No one would ever believed that a simple handkerchief that was given with love to another, could allow one to accomplish so much in a time filled with darkness...

He lifted his head and looked towards the sky... As if he was searching for something, or maybe, someone. He sighed and lowered his head. Then, he took another deep breath...

My boss still had his business running when I returned. He asked me about my future plans. I told him I do not have any and I do not know what else to do except from being a coolie. He looked at me thoughtfully. I asked him to allow me to go back to work for him again. He raised his eyebrow, paused for awhile, deep in thought. After a few moments, he shook his head and said a firm no. He said that I'm too old for it...

My heart sank. I was worrying myself about this issue for the last few days. I need to work to bring money back home. I don't like the idea of depending on my boss for our meals and accommodation. But except from being a coolie, I knew nothing else.

I pleaded with him again, stating to him that I have a wife to feed. He looked at me, his face taut. I pleaded again but he never budge. I was about to go on my knees when he gave out a big laugh. I was shocked. He was laughing so hard that he almost fell. I was confused with what's going on and I got no ideas on why he was laughing.

He looked at me, stifled his laughter and told me that he don't need anymore coolies. He has more than enough of them. What he needs now, is someone who is capable of helping him. An assistant is what he need. He looked at me and asked me whether do I want to work with him or work under him.

My heart soared from the depths of despair when he said that. I told him that I'm willing to work with him and I won't mind even if I have to work under him. He gave another big hearty laugh and told me that from tomorrow onwards, I would be his assistant.

My wife who just came out from the house heard the news in time. She came running over and thank my boss profusely. My boss shook his head. He took her hands and put them in to mine. He looked at the both of us and said that he has never seen love between two that's so strong that even war couldn't break it, distance can't separate it and death was kept away from it.

He patted my shoulders and told my wife that he trusted me because I was hardworking when I was young, and I'm honest. He placed his trust in me and that's the reason why he promoted me to a supervisor at the first place...

The old man showed me his wide grin. I have not seen him smile that broad ever since when he started on his story. This is the first time I have seen him grin. He is obviously proud of himself and of his achievements.

When I saw his wide grin, I felt kind of happy for him. The way he grin was no more of an old man, but rather, a young man who has just been promoted. For reasons unknown to me, I felt happy for him too even though it happened a long time in the past...

Sometimes, somethings do not know the flow of time... Like happiness...
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Handkerchief, His Story IV

The very next day, I followed my boss back to the docks. He had an office there so that he could overlook all the coolies. I started to learn all the ropes of the business while trying to learn how to read and write at the same time. It was hard work but I strive on. I wanted to give my wife a better life than before. No matter how hard it is for me, I'm willing to work on it.

Learning how to read and write is very hard for me at my age. I was already in my thirties. Both English and Chinese were very foreign to me. The documents were confusing and there were too many things to fill in. I kept making mistakes but my boss never gave up on me. Instead, he encouraged me and even engaged a tutor for me.

Eventually, I managed to master both languages. I was able to work with ease and my boss was very happy with my performance. We managed to clinch several deals as my boss and I were bi-lingual. We were able to do business with the British. The company grew bigger and that was also when I had a daughter. I was thirty seven.

My wife and I was delighted and so is my boss. We made him our daughter's God Father and he was excited about it. He even bought a gold chain for her. At my daughter's one month old birthday, my boss passed me a stack of documents and asked me to go through it.

The envelope was very thin, however, there was an official seal on top of it. I broke open the seal and took out the documents. The first thing I saw, was our company's name. Below it, states the nature of our business, the net profit and the name of the business owner.

Something caught my eye and I thought it was an error on the documents itself. In the ownership section, there were two names. The first, my boss. The second, mine. I showed it to my boss and told him that the one who had prepared the documents had made a mistake.

He took over the documents and read it throughly. After awhile, he raised his head, looked at me, shook his head and told me that there's no mistake in the documents itself. I was perplexed. The mistake was so glaring and he could miss it. I pointed it out to him that the names in the ownership section was wrong. He looked at it and still shook his head and said no.

It's my name in there boss, I told him. He looked at me and nodded his head. He pointed at it and asked me whether is there a mistake in the spelling. It then dawned on me on what he is doing. I looked at him with my jaws dropping, and there he was, smiling at me.

He told me that it's because of me, the company was able to expand so fast. Without my help, the company would still be a small shop. It's right that I should deserved half of the company and it's also a birthday gift to his god daughter...

The old man chuckled. He looked at me and chuckled again. I smiled as I know he was happy about it. Although it had happened so long ago, it was just like yesterday to him.

He was such a nice man! Do you believe that a man with such a big heart ever existed?

I nodded and he laughed a bit louder. When the laughter died off, he sighed...

A good man like him, should deserve a good wife. Don't you think so? But fate does not allow him to get himself a soul mate. He was in his sixties when he gave me half of the company. I have always blamed myself for not able to help him in this issue.

I ever talked to him about it, but every time, he would wave his hand and said that he got all the family he needs. That's us, and that's all he needs. Unless we don't treat him as part of the family. I shook my head when he said that. I told him that he has always been part of the family and we were honored to have him. He laughed and slapped me on my back and told me that from then onwards, we will be brothers...

It has never occurred to me that two men can be so close till this extent. Yes, I do have a lot of friends whom we called each other brothers. However, to be accepted in to the family is another issue. They were not related by blood nor in any kinship, but they put so much trust in each other that one would lay down his life for another...

We continued to work hard for the company. Every time I called him boss, he would always frown and asked me to address him by his name. As time goes by, the bond between the family grew stronger. My daughter grew up and she takes after her mother. Instead of a God father, she treated him like a grand father. But my boss doesn't mind. Instead, he was happy with the attention that my daughter had given to him.

When my daughter was fourteen, my boss contracted phuenomia. He was in his seventies when that dreaded disease came on to him. He was admitted to the hospital. I couldn't stay with him in the hospital as there's work needed to be done in the company, so my wife and my daughter went to accompany him everyday.

He was getting weaker as time goes by and my daughter was crying over it. Every time she cried, he would always use whatever strength left in him to assure her that he would be alright. He struggled for thirteen days, and on the fourteenth day, he suddenly climb out from bed and went on a stroll with my daughter.

He told my daughter how much I had suffered to be with her mother, and how hard I have been working to provide a better future for her and her mother. He told my daughter about the noodles and the handkerchief. He also told my daughter about the war that tore us apart and how we came back together.

I rushed to the hospital after my wife called me. I saw him sitting on the garden bench with my daughter in conversation. I walked slowly towards him with my wife so that we will not startle him. However, he knew about our presence and turned towards us.

He patted the empty space on the bench just beside him and asked me to join him. He told me to take care of the company when he is gone. I took his hand and told him that he will be alright. I told him that if he can stand up and walk around, I believe he will recover soon...

The old man's voice broke off once again. He sighed and looked up into the sky, his eyes blinking. He took in a deep breath and exhaled slowly. His face was quivering and his eyes, betraying sighs of sadness and the glistening of tears could be seen.

He swallowed hard, but his face could not cover the anguish. He squeezed his eyes shut and he swallowed hard again. This time clenching his fist...

There's no words to describe his emotions. Words and descriptions would be useless. The feeling of loss was too great to be written. He has lost not only a friend, a colleague, a superior but also, has lost his benefactor and a member of his family that he deeply loved...
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Handkerchief, His story V

He shook his head slowly. He then turned towards my daughter and told her that he is tired and wished to retire back in to the ward. My daughter nodded and helped him back. He paused after a few steps, turned his head and looked at me and my wife. He smiled, nodded his head and gave us a slight wave.

He never woke up after that. On that very night, he passed away in his sleep. My daughter was filled with so much grief that she just blanked out. My wife cried until she passed out. The pain and loss was so suddenly that it seems so unreal to me that, he would passed away that night when he could still walk and chat during the very same day.

I grabbed the doctor by his collar and demanded to know whether is there any mistakes made when they were administrating the medication to him. The doctor, unfazed by my actions, put his hands on my shoulders and told me to calm down. I then realised what I was doing. I apologised and the doctor just waved his hands. He said that he understood the reaction in me and he don't blame me for that.

The doctor explained that even though my boss could walk and talk, that doesn't mean he will recover. He has seen many cases like his. Patients suddenly seems to be well and healthy, able to do things that they normally could not when they were sick. The very next day, they would just pass away. The doctor told us that my boss used every strength left in him to show us that he was well. He did not want it to be tearful departure. Instead, he told us that we should be happy. Not many people lived till his age at that time.

The doctor patted me on my shoulders and offered his condolences. He told us to take it easy and prepare a grand funeral for him. I nodded gravely and that's what I had in mind too.

The wake was held for seven days. During that seven days, I knelt there in place as his son. He treated me more like a son than a brother or that's how I felt. For that seven days, a lot of people came from far and near. There was no crying at the wake. No one shed a tear. In fact, everyone present told me that I should be happy that he had lived this long. He had a family. A son, a daughter in law and a grand daughter.

My workload became heavier as I was the only one running the company after he had left me. I went home late every night and work was taking it toll on me. My wife was heart broken when she saw how tired I was. I was frequently sick due to the lack of rest. Eventually, my wife couldn't take it anymore. She offered to help me in my work.

I objected strongly, citing the reason that I do not want her to suffer anymore. It's my responsibility to work so that she could enjoy life with my daughter. She shook her head. With sobs in between, she told me that she's willing to go through the hard times again if that allowed me to be healthy. She said that material comfort was not what she wanted. All she wanted in life, was to be with me...

I had neglected her. She said that she doesn't want to sleep before I came back home and She doesn't want to see the empty bed when she woke up. She doesn't want to hear me telling her that I'm busy when she wanted to chat with me.

She wanted life to be as it used to be. Dinner with her, doing the dishes with her, chat about things that were not important... Most of all, she wanted to walked under the moonlight again... With me...

The old man's voice soften at the very end of that sentence... The grip on the handkerchief tighten. It was so tight that his hands were shaking...

I was so guilty when she said that. I didn't know that she was so lonely all this time even though we were so close physically together. It was the soul that needs the bonding. She told me that her love for me had not once falter. It was not what I am she loved me for. It was who I am that she gave her everything for...

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Handkerchief, His story VI

The old man's eyes soften. There's an affectionate look on his face, with sadness mingled, while he was looking at the handkerchief... He looked up in to the sky and took another deep breath...

In the midst of providing a good life for the both of them. I neglected the most important thing that kept the family together. The love in between us.

My wife was the one who reminded me about that when she said that she loves me for who I am. She told me that I have been away from her for too long. The war took me away from her, the company took me away from her and my daughter. She had enough of it and now she wanted me for herself, and for my daughter.

She took my hands and told me that she was willing to go through thick and thin with me. It doesn't matter we were rich or poor. It's just me and my daughter that she wanted to be with. There's no one else that was more important than us.

She lifted my hands and placed it on her face, and she rubbed her face softly against it. She told me that she missed the feeling of having my rough hands caressing her face. She then took my hands and told me that I had not been holding her hands and walked under the moonlight. She embraced me and told me that I had not took her into my arms her for a very long time. She said that she can never forget that night when I lifted her chin and looked in to her eyes with those words I said.

She touched my face, traced her fingers along the lines on my forehead and told me that time had left its trails on me. Her fingers then traced to my lips and she whispered to me that she had not been kissed by that lips of mine for eternity. Her fingers traced along my face, towards my shoulders. Her voice was quivering when she told me that her head had not been resting on these broad and strong shoulders of mine for ages. From my shoulders, her finger moved slowly towards my throat. She rested her finger there and she poked it slightly. I groaned and she barely whispered to me that she had not heard my voice for a very long time. Her fingers lowered down to my chest, and she placed her palm on it.

She stared at where her palm rested. After sometime, she lifted her head slowly and looked at me. She did not cry, but her face was full of tears. She struggled to get the words out, but in the end she started sobbing. She told me that she had not been laying her head on that chest of mine for a long long time. She missed the heartbeats, the throbbing of the soul, which pulsates to her that she was the happiest woman in the world. The heart which made her gave everything in her to me. Then, she embraced me and wailed...

The old man's head lowered. Tears were falling off from the edge of his face, but there were no sounds of crying. It isn't crying at all. Its a flow of anguish and regret from the deepest depth of his heart. An overwhelming sense of loss that is so great that it left such a void of emptiness that can nothing can takes its place.

For so long, I have not seen such regretful feelings on his time scarred face for once.

It has never been easy for him to relate his life to me. In such a short course of time, he had displayed all emotions of life. And yet, not once did he mention how cruel life, fate, destiny has been to him. He took everything that laid in his path of life without flinching.

However, the old man is still, a man. No matter how strong he is, he is still vulnerable...

Boy, it hurts you know. When she did all that to me, my heart was breaking. For every move she made, the pain in my heart gets deeper. She has suffered a lot for me boy, a lot. The only thing that a woman has of value at that time, is her youth. She gave me her very best years of her life, her prime, and yet I squandered it away.

I was supposed to be with her when she needed me the most. Instead, I picked up arms and fought for the country. I have never thought of her safety, I have never considered her feelings, her needs. When the war is over, I was supposed to be a husband, a father, a lover. But the only successful role I had ever came close to, was being the breadwinner.

She was neither pretty nor beautiful but she was not plain too. She was radiant. Time never seems to leave its trails on her face. Boy, if you had been living in my time and if you ever met her, you will definitely fall in love with her. Its not her exterior that attracts. Its her aura, the presence. Its her soul that brought me to her.

I promised her I will never neglect her again. The very next day, she went to the office with me and she started to do what I had done years earlier. She started to learn to read and write, and learn the ropes of the business. But she was a fast learner and in no time, she began to assist me in almost everything the company needs.

She was in fact, better than me in every aspect when it came to the business. Although she can outshine me, she did not. She understood her role as my assistant, her status as my wife and her place as a woman. Although she would handle almost everything from the top to bottom of the company, she would leave the big decisions to me.

When I told her that she is more suited to run the business than me, she just smiled and told me that she was my wife, my assistant and my woman. She should she will never took over what I have been doing, even if I gave her the authority. She said that its a woman's job to stand behind the man she loved and support him. Its the man who was supposed to be out there, showing the world what he can do The woman, is to make sure that the man can do that without worrying about their back.

Our love and bond grew stronger than ever before. It took us half a life time to get to be with each other. We went to work together, worked till late in to the night together, and we walked home, under the moonlight, holding each other's hand. Together.

Even though that was the busiest period of our lives, we were happy. Some people might tell you that if you see the one you loved almost every second, everyday, you will get sick of them. They might tell you that absence makes the heart fonder for each other. But not for us, my boy. The both of us had absent from each other's life for too long. Far too long in fact, and that's why we were so very close to each other.

Boy, bliss, does not come to neither you nor me. You have to work hard to achieve it. I used to think after my marriage with her, we would live blissfully till the day when death force us apart. But look at what happened. The war, the little things in life, it took away too much time from us. Time never stay still for anyone of us. Not for you, not for me, not for her either. And that's why you must treasure the one you love. Because you won't know what will happen the next day.

Thats why, we treasured each other so much, because we went through the pain of separation. The pain of not having each other by our side. So we treasure them, and so do I... Treasuring her till now. From the time when were really together, till death do us part...

From her time, to the end of her time, I have always treasured her every moment. Every second of it. From her end of her time till now, I have always treasured the words she used to say to me, the memories of us together, the life and love that we both shared...

The old man's voice faded out... There's no sense of loss in his voice. Instead, a sense of relief, a sign of fondness was detected. He was glad that he had found the way to bliss. He was even more glad that he had treasured his loved ones every time, every day, every second of it, never taking them for granted...

He was looking at the handkerchief, with a sense of longing. The love that the handkerchief has built between he and his wife was so strong that it not only built a bridge between two individuals but it also created a world of theirs.

A world where separation never exists, a place where love knows no bounds. A link thats so strong that even death can't part them. A symbol which holds so much love that nothing would ever come close to it. Ordinary, yet extraordinary at the same time...

But isn't this love is all about?
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Handkerchief, His Story VII (The Ending)

Prelude

It has taken me quite a bit of time to start on chapter VI and also finishing it. It is one of the most emotional chapters and one of the hardest chapters to express from spoken words, and emotions into the written form.

Do not be fooled by the time stamp which indicates when the story was posted. It was actually the day I started writing on the story. For those people who have been following closely on the progress of the story, knew how long I took for it.

Chapter VI is the starting of the ending. For so long, a lot of my friends, colleagues, stalkers who stalk me on msn, and on the phone, and those people who I did not know but yet read and emailed me their appreciation and support to the story, has been asking me when the story will end.

Theres no need to ask anymore, as every story will have to end. His story was never meant to be a long story, no matter how long his story is. It is the story of the handkerchief that he is telling. No matter how long it is, it is just a part of his life, yet, its one of great importance of his story. The part which made up his life, a part of him and most importantly, who he is...

I hope everyone who had walked with his story till now, will continue to walk with it till the story ends...

His Story

Time flies when you are happy. My daughter grew up and she looked a lot like her mother. It was until one day when we were celebrating her birthday that my wife and I realised that we had aged. Time has finally caught up on to her. Her hands were wrinkled, her face marked the trail of time, But I still loved her all the same.

My daughter asked us to take a break from work. She said that we should go on a vacation and leave the company to her hands. Its time for us to relax and enjoy life. The idea of going on a vacation never came to us until my daughter brought it up.

I asked my wife where she would like to go. She looked at me wide eyed, and told me that she had never been to any place outside Singapore before. I told her except from the journey from China to Singapore, and to Thailand, I have never been to any other place too.

My daughter suggested Europe as both of us were able to speak English. My wife was worried that she would lost her way with me since we have never been there before. My daughter laughed and told us not to worry, we could always asked our way around and if there's any need, she can always come and pick us back.

Ar! That is my block, I stay here with my daughter.

It was quite a long way back from where I had met him. By the time we reached, the rain had already let up. I escorted him up to his unit.

There was nothing fanciful about the apartment. Everything in there was minimalistic yet full of functionality. It never show any hints of extravagance nor luxury. However, at the wall furthest away from the door, there was a painting that's framed in gold.

It was a big oil painting of a couple. The man looked handsome and the lady, radiant. There was a piece of glass covering over it, preventing moisture and air from decaying it. From the looks of the frame, one could know how old the painting is. But the skills of the one who framed the painting was so excellent, that the picture looked like it has just been painted yesterday, as if time has never left its breath on it.

That's me and my wife.

I turned and looked at the old man who now stands beside me. There was a gleam in his eyes, and a big wide smile hung on his face, yet his eyes shows sadness at the same time. Pride and loss, were sharing the same spot on his face.

This portrait was painted before she helped in the company. She wanted to keep memories of us being young, but she refuses the camera to do the work. It lacks human touches she said and so she engaged an artist to do this portrait. It took quite sometime to get this portrait done due to its size. The artist was skillful, he managed to bring out the qualities of her in a painting. Not many people can do that and we were lucky to have him with us.

When the portrait was done, she was so happy. She smiled until you couldn't see her face! All you could see was her teeth.

The old man laughed heartily and I was surprised. I have never heard him laughed with such glee and playfulness during the journey. There were tears glistening though, no one would know whether its the dews of sadness or happiness. It might be both...

She loves the painting so much that she wanted it frame it so that it would be preserved for a long time. So we went to look for a frame maker. It was not easy. Not many people do framing for oil paintings at those days and it was so huge. But we still manage to find one frame maker though.

He was older than I was at that time. He wore very thick glasses and his hands were shaking when we saw him. We were in doubt of his abilities until we showed him the portrait. He suddenly become another man. His hands not longer shook, he removed his glasses and took a good look at the portrait. He then asked us how do we want to frame it.

I told him that I wanted to be frame in such a way that the portrait can last as long as possible. He patted his chest and told us that he could make it last forever, but the price won't be cheap. My wife and I looked at him in bafflement. He told us that he would give us a contract stating the terms that if the picture do decay after being framed by him, he or his descendants would be responsible for it.

We took his words. He asked us to come back two months later for the portrait. He didn't let us know why, only that it needed so much time. We agreed on it.

The old man walked towards the painting and placed his hands on the face of his wife. He touched it fondly, lost in his own world.

Suddenly, he tapped lightly on the glass and at that instant, the sound of it gave it away. It wasn't glass.

Do you know why he took two months for it? This is not glass, my boy. This is, sapphire and it isn't easy to come by those days, especially for one this size. You could say that it was very very valuable at that time.

My heart skipped a beat when he mentioned the word 'sapphire' . There was no synthetic sapphire yet at his time. The whole sapphire covering the portrait was a piece of natural sapphire that was cut in whole. It would cost someone the riches of an empire to get it done for a size this huge.

This, was the most expensive yet the most worthy thing I have ever spend on. It was not made to show off my riches, but rather, the want to preserve something that won't last forever.

He touched the face of the lady in the picture again, seemingly lost in his own world. I stood there watching him, not wanting to disturb him.

He turned and looked at me, with an expression which I could not put my finger on. He took a deep breath and he said...

We went to Europe as what my daughter had suggested. That was the first time that she and I took a plane. She kept on asking me how come something so heavy could fly in the air. I don't know how to tell her... Because I, myself doesn't know too.

When we touched down at the airport, we then realised that our daughter had everything planned out for us. Our hotel was booked in advance, we had a tour guide hired by my daughter, to take us to anywhere we want to go. She has thought of everything for us.

We enjoyed ourselves throughly for a month in Europe. It was the only time when I and my wife actually managed to spend time together, alone with each other. We walked around Europe hand in hand despite our age. We went back to being young once again. It was more like courtship time rather than a married life. It was the first time we had our own world to ourselves.

We came across a church while we were touring. There was a lot of people lining outside the church, dressing up as if they are preparing to get wed. However, what surprises us most, was the fact almost everyone is almost the same age as us.

Our guide told us that these people are renewing their marriage vows and she proceed to tell us how it was done. She then asked us whether are we interested in it. My wife and I looked at her and broke into laughter. We told her that we have never took any marriage vows before.

She looked surprised until when we told her that we had only held the chinese customary marriage, but never the official procedures. She then suggested that we might want to go through it once and get the feel of it. We told her that we aren't dressed in the right attire. She told us not to worry and brought us to a boutique.

Our guide told us to pick and choose the shirts and dresses need. We told her that we do not intend to buy them but she refuses to listen to us and made the assistant to fuss around us. She gave strict instructions to the boutique assistants to doll us up.

We stood there like mannequins while the assistants work on us. Our guide was talking to one of the ladies in the boutique and the lady made a phone call shortly after that. After the assistants were done with us, they led us to our guide. The lady at the counter commented on how stunning we looked and my guide agreed with a huge smile hanging at her face. She shooed us into a waiting car outside and she got the driver to send us to the church.

When we reached, our guide told us that its time to for us to take our marriage vows. She was grinning broadly. When it came to our turn, the pastor was surprised. We were the only asian couple there. Our guide stepped up to him and told him that we are able to converse in English. The pastor frowned at our guide, then turned and asked in perfect mandarin whether we want the our vows to be in English or Mandarin.

All of us were floored by his sudden exhibition of Mandarin. He gave a cheeky smile to my guide and told us not to worry. He is able to recite the vows in Mandarin as well. We looked at him and we asked for the English version. The pastor nodded and told us that he would give us a special one.

I still can remember the vows that we had recited. It goes like this....

With heaven and earth as our parents, with fate and destiny which led us, its her and her alone that you have decided to entrust your whole life to. Be it in poverty or in richness, in sickness or in good health. Be it in thick or in thin, in good fortune or in bad. Will you take her hand and promised to take care of her, comfort her, be there for her?

I can't forget that day. My stomach was having butterflies while the vows were being recited. It was like I'm marrying her for the first time. And she was so shy that she was actually blushing. We said 'I Do' when the pastor asked. After that we left the church.

We walked around the whole day in that attire of ours. We offered to pay the guide for our clothes but she refused stating that it was a long overdue wedding gift from her. We were grateful to her for that. Especially when she made us go for the vows.

We decided to go back to Singapore after that. When we were on board the plane, my wife suddenly whispered to me that she loves me. It was a direct 'I Love You'. That was the first and last time I have ever heard her saying that to me...

The old man trailed off once again. This time, he did not try to hide his feelings. He let his tears flow freely. There was no more rain to cover up his emotions... He did not wailed, neither did he sob. He stood there looking at the painting, allowing his tears to run across his cheeks.

She passed away on the way back to Singapore. I was beside her and I didn't realised. She looks as if she was sleeping. There was no sigh of pain or agony. Its like always the way she looked while she was sleeping...

The only thing she had left behind... is this handkerchief... Everytime I see the handkerchief, it always reminded me of her... That's why I treasured it always.....

End